Monday, July 20 — Database search reveals footwear fatigues camouflaged with gemstones. Located in United Kingdom. Enemy territory. Valued at over 1,000 USD. BADDaSS acknowledges footwear to correlate with Theme, approves Operation DIY, agents begin database search for codename Slipper. Objective — undermine enemy monopoly on highly overrated footwear fatigue.
2000 hours — No sign of Aquastone. Patience even thinner.
1100 hours — Receive communications from Fiesta contact. BADDaSS notified, stand down initiated. Preliminary view of hub blueprints. Satisfactory rating. Immediate inquiry posted regarding concern for cake, bar table sizes.
Tuesday, July 21 — Operation DIY agents continue search for Slipper. White satin 4-inch closed-, round-toed pumps found to be rarity. BADDaSS eyebrows raised at revelation. Requests further investigation.
Wednesday, July 22 — Search continues for Slipper. Unsuccessful. BADDaSS requests immediate update on Aquastone situation. Frustration mounts at headquarters.
Thursday, July 23 — Agents express disbelief, irritation as Slipper search continues. Cite idiotic situation as futile effort. BADDaSS commands agents to remain on Slipper detail. Search for Slipper gemstones finds success. Database site noted for future reference. BADDaSS relieved at reasonable gemstone expense. Hearty laugh in face of UK enemies.
1400 hours — Following BADDaSS classified staff meeting, agents instructed to limit Slipper search for time being. Operation DIY to commence at full scope during autumn wedding season, hopes of more numerous Slippers at that time.
Saturday, July 25 — Aquastone MIA. BADDaSS begins plot to overthrow informant and engagement ceremony to secure Aquastone. Considers contacting jeweler to learn of completion date of diamond ring, codename Girl's Best Friend, before informant becomes aware of dethroning in progress. Waiting approval.
1800 hours — Informant senses uprising, quickly takes offensive position, requests meeting with BADDaSS. Discloses information on reasons for halted engagement ceremony, cites recent incidents of sensitive nature as inappropriate timing for jubilant ceremony. BADDaSS acknowledges informant's disclosure as factual. Mutual verbal agreement to allow informant to choose moment for engagement at his discretion.
skip to main |
skip to sidebar
About Me
Blog Archive
Persons of interest
- The Bride
- The Groom — codename SPECTRE, Special Tactics and Reconnaisance, aka the informant
- The Mother — codename PUSHY, President of the Unified and Symbiotic Honorary Youngsters
- The Father
- The Matron of Honor — type 1, codename Sissy
- The Matron of Honor — type 2, codename Cutie Pie
- The Personal Attendant — codename FIRST, Formal Interceptor for Relief of Stress and Tension
- The Mother-in-law — codename Satan's minion
- The Tent Guy
- The Centerpiece Contact
- The Florist
- The Rations Provider
- The Jeweler
- The DJ
- The Baker
CLASSIFIED STAFF ONLY — Codename report
- Aquastone — gemstone engagement ring
- Girl's Best Friend — diamond wedding ring
- Slipper — ceremony footwear
- Central hub — ceremony, reception location
- Paperball — paper lantern decor
- Brooch — gemstone pin for The Bride and Merry Gang
- Theme — Happily Ever After paraphernalia, decor
- Fiesta — tent reception
- Merry — wedding ceremony
- Gang — wedding party
- Alleyway — Hobby Lobby department store
- Michaelangelo — Michael's department store
- BADDaSS — Bridal Aesthetics Department of Defense and State Security
Emergency codes
- 10-30 — Does not conform to rules or regulations
- 10-4 — acknowledgement
- Code Yellow — Dead on arrival
- 10-89 — Caution
- 10-37 — No rush
- Green light, Greenlit — hit approved
- 10-22 — Disregard
- Code Blue — Cardiac arrest
- Code Green — Psychiatric
- MIA — Missing in action
- AWOL — Away without official leave
- 10-14 — Convoy or escort
- 10-34 — Trouble at _ , all units respond
- 10-90 — Crime in progress
Operations in effect
- Operation Indian Giver — objective, to appeal to SPECTRE's sympathies for approval to keep and wear ring until wedding ceremony — full effect
- Operation White Wedding — objective, to mend ongoing turmoil between bride and Satan’s minion for the sake of avoiding altercation or imprisonment for bloodshed, possible strangulation — terminated
- Operation DIY — objective, to undermine enemy monopoly on highly overrated footwear fatigue by self-assembly — in effect, periodical updates
- Operation Satin — objective, to locate less expensive sash fatigue materials — full effect
- Operation Aquastone — objective, to recover engagement gemstone ring from informant — full effect
- Operation Amethyst — objective, to locate gems for female officials in Merry Gang — temporary termination
- Operation Ancestor — classified staff only — waiting final transaction
- Operation Glitz — objective, to locate gems for Merry fatigues — temporary termination
- Operation Little Flower, Big Wheel — objective, to obtain centerpieces reflecting theme, flower decor — postponed
- Operation Mother Outlaw — objective, to extract future mother-in-law from bridal process — full effect, high alert
Followers
No comments:
Post a Comment