Sunday, July 5 — BADDaSS requisition received from command post. Mission — locate appealing gem for Merry fatigues. Initial search begins. Codename Brooch, Operation Glitz.
2100 hours — Discover rare items during Codename Brooch investigation. BADDaSS informed, top secret mission, codename Ancestor.
Monday, July 6 — Operations Glitz, Ancestor continue. Database search reveals several gems adequate for fatigues. Gems of clear quality abundant, limited in search "amethyst." Operation Ancestor makes headway.
1100 hours — Temporary termination of Operation Glitz. Requires further investigation of Merry fatigues. Operation Glitz to recommence upon final fatigue transaction, date unknown. Code 10-37.
1120 hours — Disbanded Glitz agents form Operation Amethyst. Objective — locate gems for female officials in Merry Gang. Code 10-37.
Wednesday, July 8 — Operation Amethyst triumphant. Gem discovered, postponed until final fatigue transaction to ensure complement to codename Theme. Operation Ancestor finalized, postponed until monetary funds secure for transaction.
1100 hours — Database search for alternate fatigue sash provider, Operation Satin. Locate two independent agents in Kansas City area. BADDaSS requests proof agents are not of Nazi regime. Immediate investigation necessary.
Thursday, July 9 — Secure contact with rations provider. Verbal agreement for delivery of expense report. VIP meeting scheduled, Wednesday, July 15, 1600 hours.
1200 hours — Operation Little Flower, Big Wheel gains headway, monitoring sales of codenames Michaelangelo and Alleyway through secure database. Receive weekly negotiations, notifications on new merchandise. BADDaSS confirms florist unaware of operation. Proceed with caution.
1500 hours — Travel with informant to outlying merchant zone. Informant reveals receipt of engagement ring, codename Aquastone. Taunts me with knowledge of location. Secret vow to discover Aquastone location upon return to lair. BADDaSS notified of informant's mercenary tactics. Immediate dock in compensation. Probation sentence increased.
1600 hours — Transaction for periodical. Discover colored paper lantern hub decor. Codename Paperball. Air of excitement at BADDaSS headquarters.
1800 hours — Informant reveals Satan's Minion will not depart lair as standard operating procedure. BADDaSS displeased. Must contain bodily fluids until departure of lair. Blame SM for discomfort.
1820 hours — Informant commences taunting of Aquastone's whereabouts while incapacitated in rest area. Operation Aquastone initiated. BADDaSS agents at arms, enter ground-level lair, quickly recover Aquastone and remove from crate. Heart flutters at sight. Replace to crate and former location. Return to upper-level lair, mock informant of Aquastone discovery. Cite informant's inefficient tactics of concealment, faulty camouflage. Hearty, evil laugh.
1840 hours — Informant exits rest area, recovers Aquastone, admonishes me for operation. BADDaSS withdraws, tail tucked between legs. Informant leaves Aquastone in plain sight as oppressive retaliation. Instructed not to make eye contact with Aquastone. Executive decision made within BADDaSS to dismantle informant's unanticipated authority.
7.17.2009
6.30.2009
Week Three
Monday, June 29 — Successful contact with Fiesta headquarters. Given viable excuse for radio silence. Greenlit aborted. Receive Fiesta hub blueprints, itemized spreadsheet. Calculate extreme overage in initial hub expenses. Awaiting official quote. Father’s approval high priority upon receiving official quote.
2145 hours — Secure communications, familial informant, codename Sissy, reveals possible plot of Theme sabotage. Local civilian uses horse-drawn carriage in flight attempt, similar fatigues in wedding ceremony. Reassure Sissy of unabolished Theme. *Note — Theme includes horse-drawn wagon for civilian transport and post-Merry flight. Sash on fatigues dissimilar in color, measurement specs. Items determined months in advance of civilian’s use in unimpressive ceremony. Determined as a no-threat situation. BADDaSS informed of false alarm, code 10-22.
2200 hours — undercover informant reveals SM’s observance of my absence in lair. SM inquires about my emotional state, possible offenses committed by SM. Informant responds, “I don’t know.” Immediate dock in compensation. BADDaSS informed, official reprimand filed.
Wednesday, July 1 — Communications with fatigue manufacturer in hopes of recovering sash for Codename Merry attire. Nazi regimist reports sash valued at 40 US dollars per square yard, but attainable as individual item. Dampening of spirit. Vow to end Nazi regime post-Merry conflict.
1900 hours — Report sash fatigue expense to Mother. Code Blue. Standby.
1910 hours — Mother gains full recovery from Code Blue. Begins datebase search for similar sash fatigues. Inquiry — “is that exact color necessary?” BADDaSS informed of second uprising. Survelliance request approved for Mother.
2145 hours — Secure communications, familial informant, codename Sissy, reveals possible plot of Theme sabotage. Local civilian uses horse-drawn carriage in flight attempt, similar fatigues in wedding ceremony. Reassure Sissy of unabolished Theme. *Note — Theme includes horse-drawn wagon for civilian transport and post-Merry flight. Sash on fatigues dissimilar in color, measurement specs. Items determined months in advance of civilian’s use in unimpressive ceremony. Determined as a no-threat situation. BADDaSS informed of false alarm, code 10-22.
2200 hours — undercover informant reveals SM’s observance of my absence in lair. SM inquires about my emotional state, possible offenses committed by SM. Informant responds, “I don’t know.” Immediate dock in compensation. BADDaSS informed, official reprimand filed.
Wednesday, July 1 — Communications with fatigue manufacturer in hopes of recovering sash for Codename Merry attire. Nazi regimist reports sash valued at 40 US dollars per square yard, but attainable as individual item. Dampening of spirit. Vow to end Nazi regime post-Merry conflict.
1900 hours — Report sash fatigue expense to Mother. Code Blue. Standby.
1910 hours — Mother gains full recovery from Code Blue. Begins datebase search for similar sash fatigues. Inquiry — “is that exact color necessary?” BADDaSS informed of second uprising. Survelliance request approved for Mother.
Thursday, July 2 — Escorted convoy to hub headquarters with security deposit. Hub guardian MIA. Childhood acquaintance present at guardian's merchant business. Unpleasant reunion, struggle with thoughts of strangling offender. Immediate departure necessary.
Saturday, July 4 — Travel with informant in custody to undisclosed location. Informant spills ice cream beverage on shirt repeatedly, bitches incessantly. Re-route to purchase replacement fatigues. Dock in pay for time lost.
1500 hours — Arrive at location to purchase luminary items for hub decor. Attempt to purchase thwarted, luminary representative unwilling to accept payment, cites payment received during prior transaction. Immediate exit before representative realizes error. Justification — clearance items, repair needed to luminaries. BADDaSS approves operation.
1900 hours — Niece declares distaste for referring to informant as "uncle." Taunts, insults informant. Extreme enjoyment from spectacle. BADDaSS declares retribution from previous conflicts, satisfied for time being. Restitution of informant compensation, sentence reduced to probation.
Saturday, July 4 — Travel with informant in custody to undisclosed location. Informant spills ice cream beverage on shirt repeatedly, bitches incessantly. Re-route to purchase replacement fatigues. Dock in pay for time lost.
1500 hours — Arrive at location to purchase luminary items for hub decor. Attempt to purchase thwarted, luminary representative unwilling to accept payment, cites payment received during prior transaction. Immediate exit before representative realizes error. Justification — clearance items, repair needed to luminaries. BADDaSS approves operation.
1900 hours — Niece declares distaste for referring to informant as "uncle." Taunts, insults informant. Extreme enjoyment from spectacle. BADDaSS declares retribution from previous conflicts, satisfied for time being. Restitution of informant compensation, sentence reduced to probation.
6.24.2009
Week Two
Sunday, June 21 — 0700 hours, continue research into Operation Little Flower, Big Wheel. Confused by lack of organization on digital blueprints. Attribute to inferior human intelligence. Location — New Jersey.
Mother uses words "do you really need that" "unnecessary," "when your father and I got married." Uprising quelled with lengthy evil glance. No further resistance anticipated.
Sleepless night. Wake from fitful dreams. Flashes of hydrangeas, tulle, manicured claws and red, piercing eyes. Sweating profusely. Dog watches me cautiously from end of bed, glances several times at door.
Monday, June 22 — Operation Little Flower, Big Wheel contact from New Jersey speaks gibberish. Too fast for human comprehension. Strange dialect. Code Green. Centerpieces depend on ability of coercion to speak English language. Confirm former concerns of inferior intelligence.
Tuesday, June 23 — Tent representative MIA. Still awaiting completion of guest list from Satan's minion. Operation Mother Outlaw in full effect. Avoiding all contact to lessen poisoning of jubilant atmosphere.
Operation at 1800 hours — Code 10-14 AWOL. SM aware of my presence at lair's gate. Successful entrance, lacks interaction, conflict.
1810 hours — Receive SM's guest list documentation from informant. Emergency meeting, classified staff only. Final approval of document granted, lacks civilian excesses. Stand down ordered.
1820 hours — Informant reveals SM's contempt for finalized wedding party, codename Gang. SM requests heirs for delivery of titanium shipment during ceremony, codename Merry. SM accuses treason. Operation Mother Outlaw initiated. Code 10-34. Man all battle stations. High alert.
1900 hours — Lair exit strategy successful. Maintain high alert. Standby.
1940 hours — Secure communications, learn of SM's gathering, scheduled 1700 hours 25.6.2009. Suspicion tainted, poisoned rations. Possible 10-90. Emergency meeting, classified staff only. Will notify SM through informant of absence - mandatory shift. Crisis averted.
Wednesday, June 24 — Informant reveals SM disposed of personal rations in upper level lair. Noting as standard behavior. Possible backlash from codename Merry Gang conflict. Starvation until departure of lower level hellpit and outlying areas. Immediate response from BADDaSS requested.
Thursday, June 25 — Discover guest citations in ancient scroll type. Further investigation required. Continued radio silence from tent representative. Aggravation takes hold as planning process halts. Must contact tent representative, codename Fiesta, at any cost.
Saturday, June 27 - Informant displays annoying indifference toward ceremonial glasses, cutlery. Placed in strategic mental choke hold until agreeable in nature. Discover photograph relic in pumpkin coach design, codename Theme. Note - progressive connection of Theme in codename Merry and central hub. Fiesta contact continues radio silence. Greenlit.
Mother uses words "do you really need that" "unnecessary," "when your father and I got married." Uprising quelled with lengthy evil glance. No further resistance anticipated.
Sleepless night. Wake from fitful dreams. Flashes of hydrangeas, tulle, manicured claws and red, piercing eyes. Sweating profusely. Dog watches me cautiously from end of bed, glances several times at door.
Monday, June 22 — Operation Little Flower, Big Wheel contact from New Jersey speaks gibberish. Too fast for human comprehension. Strange dialect. Code Green. Centerpieces depend on ability of coercion to speak English language. Confirm former concerns of inferior intelligence.
Tuesday, June 23 — Tent representative MIA. Still awaiting completion of guest list from Satan's minion. Operation Mother Outlaw in full effect. Avoiding all contact to lessen poisoning of jubilant atmosphere.
Operation at 1800 hours — Code 10-14 AWOL. SM aware of my presence at lair's gate. Successful entrance, lacks interaction, conflict.
1810 hours — Receive SM's guest list documentation from informant. Emergency meeting, classified staff only. Final approval of document granted, lacks civilian excesses. Stand down ordered.
1820 hours — Informant reveals SM's contempt for finalized wedding party, codename Gang. SM requests heirs for delivery of titanium shipment during ceremony, codename Merry. SM accuses treason. Operation Mother Outlaw initiated. Code 10-34. Man all battle stations. High alert.
1900 hours — Lair exit strategy successful. Maintain high alert. Standby.
1940 hours — Secure communications, learn of SM's gathering, scheduled 1700 hours 25.6.2009. Suspicion tainted, poisoned rations. Possible 10-90. Emergency meeting, classified staff only. Will notify SM through informant of absence - mandatory shift. Crisis averted.
Wednesday, June 24 — Informant reveals SM disposed of personal rations in upper level lair. Noting as standard behavior. Possible backlash from codename Merry Gang conflict. Starvation until departure of lower level hellpit and outlying areas. Immediate response from BADDaSS requested.
Thursday, June 25 — Discover guest citations in ancient scroll type. Further investigation required. Continued radio silence from tent representative. Aggravation takes hold as planning process halts. Must contact tent representative, codename Fiesta, at any cost.
Saturday, June 27 - Informant displays annoying indifference toward ceremonial glasses, cutlery. Placed in strategic mental choke hold until agreeable in nature. Discover photograph relic in pumpkin coach design, codename Theme. Note - progressive connection of Theme in codename Merry and central hub. Fiesta contact continues radio silence. Greenlit.
6.23.2009
Week One
Wednesday, June 17 — Sensitive wedding information leaked to public. Father inquires about budget. Slight cringe.
Receive expense spreadsheet at 12:12 p.m. Baker devastatingly over-priced. Convicted felon known by gang symbol, "DJ" expensive for obnoxious display and lack of talent. Must uncover secrets of unabashed success.
Contact with central alliance hub at 0115 hours. At 1700 hours, discover suspicions of damaged exterior, possible biological attack on guests. Recognizance denied, hub location to be determined.
Thursday, June 18 — Warfare has already begun. Future mother-in-law attempts to thwart dreams of harmonious day with guest list and wedding party oppression. Plans forthcoming for her extrication from bridal process. Operation Mother Outlaw.
Florist eyes me warily upon mention of silk flowers. Must confirm she does not own automatic weapons. 10-4 on purple flowers.
Monetary funds for escape secure. Offshore bank account awaiting transaction.
Friday, June 19 — Guest citations chosen despite tornadic weather underway. Approval granted for necessary voucher to enter hub. Operation Mother Outlaw, classified staff only, objective — limited civilian representation at hub.
Secured location for contractual agreement ritual.
Learn of devious plot by Satan's minion to undermine engagement ceremony. Informant deep under cover. Will update daily on SM's progress. Investigating water boarding technique in the event of capture. Operation Mother Outlaw makes headway with Bridal Aesthetics Department of Defense and State Security (BADDaSS).
Saturday, June 20 — Discover fatigue manufacturer operating under Nazi regime, dress valued at over $1,000. Crystals on dress appear to be cheap, broken glass. Possible guise for "high fashion." Nonchalantly broadcast promise to return. Escape with only our lives.
Jeweler pronounces all 'R's as 'W's, but completes exceptional ring wax. Amused by his antics in discussing popular jewelry stores' tendencies to lie, cheat. *Note: Do not conduct transactions in chain jewelry stores.
Enter structures of codename Michelangelo and Alleyway with extreme caution. Informant ready to alert and abort mission in event of florist's knowledge of operation. Obtain photographic evidence of silk flowers. Download immediately to secure server.
Dangerous weather on return. Second ill foreboding.
2000 hours - Discover alternative route for centerpiece. Must conceal from florist until appropriate moment. Firearms have not been confirmed nor denied. Operation Little Flower, Big Wheel.
Receive expense spreadsheet at 12:12 p.m. Baker devastatingly over-priced. Convicted felon known by gang symbol, "DJ" expensive for obnoxious display and lack of talent. Must uncover secrets of unabashed success.
Contact with central alliance hub at 0115 hours. At 1700 hours, discover suspicions of damaged exterior, possible biological attack on guests. Recognizance denied, hub location to be determined.
Thursday, June 18 — Warfare has already begun. Future mother-in-law attempts to thwart dreams of harmonious day with guest list and wedding party oppression. Plans forthcoming for her extrication from bridal process. Operation Mother Outlaw.
Florist eyes me warily upon mention of silk flowers. Must confirm she does not own automatic weapons. 10-4 on purple flowers.
Monetary funds for escape secure. Offshore bank account awaiting transaction.
Friday, June 19 — Guest citations chosen despite tornadic weather underway. Approval granted for necessary voucher to enter hub. Operation Mother Outlaw, classified staff only, objective — limited civilian representation at hub.
Secured location for contractual agreement ritual.
Learn of devious plot by Satan's minion to undermine engagement ceremony. Informant deep under cover. Will update daily on SM's progress. Investigating water boarding technique in the event of capture. Operation Mother Outlaw makes headway with Bridal Aesthetics Department of Defense and State Security (BADDaSS).
Saturday, June 20 — Discover fatigue manufacturer operating under Nazi regime, dress valued at over $1,000. Crystals on dress appear to be cheap, broken glass. Possible guise for "high fashion." Nonchalantly broadcast promise to return. Escape with only our lives.
Jeweler pronounces all 'R's as 'W's, but completes exceptional ring wax. Amused by his antics in discussing popular jewelry stores' tendencies to lie, cheat. *Note: Do not conduct transactions in chain jewelry stores.
Enter structures of codename Michelangelo and Alleyway with extreme caution. Informant ready to alert and abort mission in event of florist's knowledge of operation. Obtain photographic evidence of silk flowers. Download immediately to secure server.
Dangerous weather on return. Second ill foreboding.
2000 hours - Discover alternative route for centerpiece. Must conceal from florist until appropriate moment. Firearms have not been confirmed nor denied. Operation Little Flower, Big Wheel.
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